Women’s (and Ken’s) business

The books Period Power by Maisie Hill and Period Queen by Lucy Peach have inspired my understanding and journey to living an inspired life guided by my menstrual cycle. I’ve also drawn from the wisdom shared in women’s circles around the globe, insights on natural birth control, and an earth-based spiritual practice.

First and foremost, what you do on your period—or throughout your cycle—that nourishes your body and soul is both important and radical; it is my dream to inspire more of that. Whether you menstruate or support someone who does, I hope you find this information both enlightening and empowering.

If you haven’t started tracking your period, give it a try. It offers so many benefits beyond preventing pregnancy. My cycle is my life, rather than a single, point in the month.

It is possible to love bleeding. I remember being surprised when I first heard that. Could you really feel excited by something that caused pain, discomfort and shame? In time, you might even find yourself saying a thank-you prayer when it arrives. Heck yes.

While I’ve been fortunate not to have experienced severe discomfort during menstruation, I know many do, and I encourage others to seek the care they deserve. You don’t have to live your life curled up in pain. It isn’t normal, and it shouldn’t be normalised, by health professionals or others. If this is you, please start by seeking support. For those of you who support women who menstruate, kindly encourage the women around you to get the help they need. Find healthcare professionals who truly listen— and don’t stop until you do.

Secondly, consider additional support: TENS, acupuncture, or working with healers who focus on the womb and ancestral practices. Ideally, all of the above. Follow your intuition—whatever feels right and wherever you’re guided. It may be a long process, but it’s certainly one that is worth it.

Thirdly, and something you can start immediately and for free, is gathering information on your cycle. Through my years of shamanic training, the first step is always your willingness to see - to witness - to start creating change in your life.

Here are some questions to ask yourself.

• What is the duration of your cycle?

• Does it change duration when life is good versus when it’s challenging?

• How does stress, changes in your diet (e.g veganism/vegetarianism), lack of sleep, or alcohol and drugs affect it?

• When does your luteal phase—the second half of your cycle—feel more intense?

• Which hormones seem to have the greatest effect on you? Oestrogen/ Progesteron. What are the Peaks and troughs for you?

This information is richer than gold—some might even say it’s like discovering the treasure of stem cells. (Ba boom kah)

I find it easier to look at my cycle in four stages:

• Winter — Spring — Summer – Autumn
or
• Dream – Do – Give – Take

Both frameworks are brilliantly outlined in the books above. Here’s my interpretation:

• Winter/Dream: This is your bleed—your menstrual cycle, often thought of as your moon. Days 1-5, upto 7
• Spring/Do: The phase from when your menstruation finishes until ovulation. Days 5-7 until 12-14
• Summer/Give: From ovulation until your progesterone drops. Days 12-14 until 20 or 21
• Autumn/Take: The final part of your cycle, from when progesterone drops until your next bleed. Days 20-21 until 28-30

(For those that like the science) We menstruate, then enter the follicular phase, ovulation, and luteal phase before starting the cycle again. Oestrogen rises dramatically after we finish bleeding and then drops before ovulation, having a small spike around day 20/21. Progesterone is steady and then climbs at day 14 until day 20/21, where it spikes off.

Learning that my progesterone levels drop around day 20 to 21 has revolutionised my life. My pre-menstrual stage is rarely severe—yes, I do become sharper in my words and less tolerant. My exception to this rule is not to trust my thoughts on day 21. I often find the next day(s) I am clearer in my mind, and the things that bothered me no longer seem to cause me distress. I now view this as a cue to be extra kind to myself, whether that means ordering a meal, wrapping up in warm pajamas, or simply taking time out for myself. It’s my hall pass for the cycle: when I see it on the calendar, I prepare for some self-care.

Learning when to ask for help and preparing for day 21 has truly transformed my cycle. While I usually feel well resourced throughout the rest of the month, I’ve come to recognize that this day deserves special attention. Instead of expecting others to guess your needs, try gently communicating what will help you feel cared for. By sharing your needs openly, you create a nurturing environment that benefits everyone.

Remember, PMS and PMT can offer valuable insights. As you approach the final phase, take a moment to reflect on what you need to release. If you find yourself growing impatient for your period, it could be a sign you need to slow down and gently reassess your energy. Journaling or quiet reflection can help you navigate this time with care so you are less likely to make any irrational decisions or act out of alignment.

During this phase you naturally want to eat more to support your energy levels due to lower progesterone levels. Preparing and packing more whole foods can help prevent binging on highly processed options. Spend some time preparing the foods you love indulging in that make your body feel great. I have a Autumnal phase ritual of preparing a tray of roasted potatoes to eat all to myself! YUM!

Sometimes my period comes effortlessly, othertimes I earn it. My body is perfect in the way it waits for the perfect moment to let go, to soften, to bleed—ushering in a new and wonderful cycle. The body cannot bleed properly when it’s in a state of fight or flight. I often find that I feel fuller right before my period—almost like a moon gaining shape and momentum. Bleeding is the ultimate surrender.

As you await that miraculous bleed, consider asking yourself: Where can I soften? What do I need to let go? How can I release and welcome the new that’s waiting to emerge?

This is a highly creative time in your cycle. Let your feelings and emotions flow; on the other side of anxiety and angst lies a beautifully inquisitive part of you, eager to solve problems and create solutions.

During my period, I try to keep my schedule light. Life can be unpredictable, but even planning one or two days for gentle self-care can make a big difference. This can be challenging if your cycle isn’t regular, but if you plan for it, you can enjoy the last day of your cycle for rest and replenishment, or if it arrives early, day 2 or 3 when you bleed may be heavier.

Realistically, there will be times when you need more time—just to be and bleed. Other times, you might get away with less time. My main advice is: do what feels right for you. Start small and expand from there.

Sometimes I feel inspired to celebrate my cycle in creative ways—whether that’s wearing a beautiful red dress and announcing my menstruation to anyone that will listen. Othertimes, I lie in bed with a hot water bottle, alternating between bouts of cramps and moments of meditation. When you meditate during pain, your body naturally releases endorphins—the feel good chemicals that help reduce discomfort and lift your mood. By focusing your mind through meditation, you can gently tap into this natural process and experience a subtle surge of positive emotions, transforming this difficult moment into an opportunity for self healing. Othertimes, I am out frollicking in nature, enjoying some peace and quiet. There’s no right or wrong way to experience this time; it’s all about what feels right for you.

This is also a beautiful time to connect with your menstruation. Consider the liberating experience of free bleeding under a tree, anointing yourself and a partner, or creating art inspired by your blood. Embrace your wild, curious spirit.

Your period may be a time where you would like to turn inwards and connect with yourself, but equally if can be a time of deep union with a partner. During menstruation, a woman is more sensitive, intuitive, aware and connected to source. Sharing intimacy can bring a shared sense of connection, softness, honour and renewal to your union by honoring this special passage.

In acknowledging our choices, we get to acknowledge our privledge: access to period supplies, supportive communities, quality healthcare, freedom of choice, and birth control options. Maybe you would like to donate to a charity that helps support women, periods and sex education in developing countries.

During Autumn and Winter (Luteal and menstruation phase) this is also a time to avoid painful procedures, as your body can be more sensitive—so perhaps skip tattooing or waxing during this phase.

When supporting a woman who's menstruating, start by gently asking her how you can best support her. She may just appreciate having you nearby — reading together quietly, offering a simple acknowledgment, or perhaps a little space. Whatever it is, offer your presence in the way that feels right for her. You'll soon notice how her love and care flow back to you, deepening the connection between you.

After your period, you might find a renewed energy that invites you to step back into the world with confidence. Transitions are important, so try to mindfully dance from your bleeding self into your building self as you bridge the way. Moving from each phase of your cycle can feel a little wobbly, so extra kindness is always helpful when moving from one phase to the next.

As the days pass, you can begin to push your body’s edges when exercising, enjoy some afro beats, and relish that vibrant energy that is building. If you need to schedule an extra commitment and are unsure of the timing, use this phase for a little wiggle room. Boom, before you know it - it’s ovulation time.

This is a great time to confidently ask for what you want—you smell wonderful. Whether you feel more vibrant during ovulation or at another point in your cycle, consider planning moments that honor your unique rhythm—perhaps a special date night or some solo time to connect with your sensual side. Maybe it’s pulling off a new outfit or trying something new and challenging.

Before you know it, it’s time to enjoy the last of that diminishing sun, as you slow down and transition into Autumn. This is a beautiful time to give to others, finding places where you can weave and illuminate your magic into the the people and places who love and support you. This is a brilliant time to be your radiant self and to give back in the ways that only you know how.

Ultimately, our cycles offer rich insights into our physical, emotional, and creative selves. By tuning in to these natural rhythms, we can create a life that feels more aligned and nurturing. I hope you’ll find encouragement in exploring your own cycle as a source of empowerment and gentle self-discovery.